查看完整版本: 命里缺

命里缺

1、命里缺。。。
小鑫：爸爸，为什么我的名字里面三个金呢？
爸爸：你命里缺金，所以取名叫鑫，就像有些人命里缺水，就取名叫淼，还有些人命里缺木就叫森。
小鑫：爸爸，您说那郭晶晶姐姐命里缺什么呢？
评论:这孩子能够举一反三，真是太有才了，无语……
2、2、一个人正在与他的一个朋友在商店里购物，突然，有两个强盗闯进来抢劫，当强盗开始挨个搜查顾客的腰包时，这个人突然觉得他的朋友在轻轻地捅他并悄声说：“拿着这个。”
“别给我手枪，我可不想当英雄。”
朋友：“快拿着吧，这是我欠你的二十五元钱。”
评论：交友如此，真是人生一大悲哀啊
3、患者：“大夫，我的记忆力越来越差了。”
大夫：“差到什么程度？”
患者：“我上了公共汽车，老是忘记买票；上饭店吃饭，总是不付款就走。”
大夫：“噢，你先把医疗费付下，咱们再看病吧。”
评论：这医生很有先见之明，这如果不是记忆问题，就是人品问题了
4、某饭店。一日，客人发现菜中有一只苍蝇，笑曰：“老板，看来这顿你请了。”老板连连陪笑，心里却很是不爽。
过几日，这几位伙计又来了。
菜都吃得差不多了，却又发现一只苍蝇，不由地皱起了眉头，遂叫老板。老板捎了捎后脑勺：“明明是五只，怎么只有一只了？”
评论：天下没有白吃的晚餐，出来混，总是要还的，呵呵
5、某司机开车路过女儿国某村庄。看见一女子容貌端庄、体态婀娜，于是下车想非礼她。  
    那女子见了，慌忙大叫：“快来人啊，快来人啊。”  
    司机听了，连忙跳上车去，驾车潜逃。
    那女子在车后跺着脚道：“胆小鬼，老娘只是想多叫几个姐妹来和你一起玩玩，就怕成这样！”  
   评论：有色心没色胆的司机，这下亏大了

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第一个搞笑的帖子就吸引了俺的眼球，后面的更是精彩。女人国少见男人，一见男人，不要人命，司机跑了还是好的。

餐厅老板挺幽默的，这一招吓死那些吃霸王餐的，说不定以后也用得上。